Leopold Broom Investigates: Not only The Chocolate Starfish, but also The Hot Dog Flavoured Water

by Lee Cross

Books are my thing, you only need to read my ramblings on Literati Pulp to know it, but I’m also interested all forms of creative writing; how ideas are formulated, developed and brought together. I find the whole process really interesting, and love viewing it from different artistic perspectives.

So, I was listening to this random song on Spotify earlier.

These are the lyrics. (I’m afraid there’s rather a lot of swearing).

Hot Dog: By Limp Bizkit

Ladies and gentlemen! Introducing the Chocolate Starfish! And the Hotdog Flavored Water Bring it on!

Get the fuck up! Yeah! Check, one, two

Listen up, listen up! Here we go It’s a fucked up world We’re a fucked up place

Everybody’s judged by their fucked up face Fucked up dreams Fucked up life A fucked up kid

With a fucked up knife Fucked up moms And fucked up dads It’s a fucked up cop

With a fucked up badge Fucked up job With fucked up pay And a fucked up boss

Is a fucked up pain Fucked up press And fucked up lies Well, Lethal’s in the back With the fact of the fires

[I’m sure nobody will mind if I stop there]

So, I’m interested how writing is created and, casting any sense of modesty aside, I’ve read more than my fair share, have a good bead on how things come together, where they are going and why they’re heading there.

That said, how exactly do you write the above sequence of words? Why on earth do you bother? And what exactly is the message you are trying to convey?

It seems as though the whole thing has something to do with the rebellions of youth, the insecurities of adult hood, and the unfairness of life.

And, lest we forget, saying the word “fuck”.

I’m not being negative, I’ve actually loved Limp Bizkit whenever I’ve seen them live, they’re a lot of fun… but, quite honestly, I have no idea who either the Chocolate Starfish or Hot-Dog Flavoured Water are, or why they’re worthy of a specific introduction.

And I don’t suspect I’ll ever be able to figure out Mr Fred Durst’s creative process… and this man is a multi-platinum selling, multi-millionaire.

That’s it, there really isn’t much point to this blog. But then there really isn’t much point to that song.

Funny old world.


One thought on “Leopold Broom Investigates: Not only The Chocolate Starfish, but also The Hot Dog Flavoured Water

  1. mrjohndorney says:

    I have a sneaking feeling ‘chocolate starfish’ is intending to mean one’s… well… the hole in one’s bottom area. And ‘hot dog flavoured water’… well… is similarly saucy. Let’s just say God bless your innocence.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s